I love the word ‘idiosyncrasy’.
I’ve been enjoying the self-expository nature of this blogging experience so why not cut another piece of myself open to show the world what a freak I am?
Ha, except I don’t think I’m a freak at all. More and more, as I explore a wider range of blogs and follow more people on this social media thing, I’ve come to realize that we belong to a globe overflowing with eccentric people with abnormal behaviours. I’m convinced that no behavior is isolated anymore; I’m sure I’m going to list a bunch of my weird tendencies here and people are either going to comment or think to themselves…’Hey…I do that too!’. Which is cool. I’m not super possessive about my oddities, so have at them.
1) I talk to myself A LOT when I’m driving. Thank God for the advent of hands-free because had these not been a popular device, I would have no reprieve from the judgmental stares of drivers next to me at a traffic light. I conjure up imaginary situations most of the time, but if I have something like an interview or presentation coming up I usually create a hypothetical version of said event and go through several versions of it on my long drive to and from home. In case you were wondering, no, I do not take on the persona of my audience or interviewee or whoever I’m play-conversing with, I just think of questions and respond to them aloud. I don’t know why I do it. Maybe it’s risen from extreme heights of boredom associated with traversing the east-west corridor…maybe I just REALLY like to talk, and will do so even when I have no one to talk to.
2) I Google everything. When someone asks me a question that I don’t have an answer to (based on my own experience or some already randomly acquired knowledge) I Google it. When I’m watching a movie and I don’t get a reference or don’t know the name of an actor with a familiar face, I IMDB the movie and find out who it is I’m watching. When I’m waiting for an interview, I Google my interviewer so I get a better sense of whom I’m about to encounter and eventually be judged by. One of my friends surmised it’s an addition to dopamine and I’m gonna stick with that one.
3) I don’t drink milk. Even when I was younger and not so convinced that I was lactose intolerant (actual medical diagnosis is still pending, mainly because I’ve never sought it) I had a fear of milk. I smell it obsessively to make sure it isn’t spoiled. Now I’ve convinced myself that milk makes my stomach twist into knots and tell people I’m lactose intolerant to avoid ingesting the vile liquid.
4) I cannot sleep with my face covered or obstructed in any way. I also cannot sleep if there is any kind of light or noise. I used to sleep with an eye mask and ear plugs at all times, but I’ve been able to sleep with one or the other these days. I have a messed up relationship with sleep on the whole actually. I love the idea of sleep but my mind doesn’t really ever let me get a restful sleep.
5) Being late for anything gets me very very upset. It used to be so bad when I was younger that I would actually get angry, anxiety attacks and rage cry and stuff. Very psycho. Then in University I got into a relationship with someone who was perpetually late and didn’t give a shit if it bothered me, so I had to moderate my very strong feelings about tardiness. I’m still an obnoxiously punctual person now, I just don’t go crazy when I’m late anymore.
6) I am SUPER bothered by yelling.I rarely ever raise my voice so it really perturbs me when people shout at each other, whether in anger or just because they don’t want to get closer and speak at a normal decibel level. It makes me very uneasy when people are loud to the point where I feel anxious. Loud music in settings that are not nightlife related also makes me uncomfortable.
7) I cannot write on my hands. Never have been able to, not even in secondary school when writing on one’s hands was something of a staple. In the rare event that someone did mark my skin I’d immediately go remove it, even if that meant rubbing my hands raw. It irks me to see any kind of inconsistency on my skin. That said, if I ever get a tattoo, it better be somewhere I can’t see it.
That’s all for now. One day I want to be able to share my interesting tale of anxiety with you guys but let’s face it, we barely know each other. So let’s have some virtual drinks, a little cyber sushi and then maybe I’ll expose the details of one of the darkest periods of my life to y’all m’kay? Remember I’m melodramatic too eh, so the ‘darkest period of my life’ may be something of an exaggeration. Or not. We’ll see. Maybe.